OH MY GOD IT'S JULY
Sunday, July 16, 2017
You know when you receive a text, but you just don't have the time to reply right now, so you put your phone down somewhere (or continue scrolling through Instagram) and make a mental note to get back to them a.s.a.p, but suddenly it's the year 2041 and too much time has passed it would actually be rude to ever interact with them ever again?
That's a perfect metaphor for how I feel about my blog right now.
Well this is rather embarrassing.
Starting my blog in August 2016 was certainly one of the best decisions I've ever made, and this new life as a blogger filled me with so much excitement and gave me so many exciting opportunities towards the end of last year.
However, 2017 has been a massive flop.
After getting my blogging career off to a pretty awesome start, I headed into the new year pretty confident that I would dedicate the next 365 days and beyond to making my blog, my brand and my online presence the best it could be, and I may be being harsh on myself here, but what actually unfolded couldn't be another further from that. Apart from a few scheduled posts popping up on my blog, I was pretty absent from all online platforms during January, which as those who know me will be aware, that's extremely out of character as I usually can't make it through my day without at least one sarcastic tweet. As a consequence of my short social media hiatus (which I still to this day do not have a reasonable explanation for), my blog inevitably suffered. Don't get me wrong, I've never been one to obsess over the number of likes, views or retweets my content gets, but when I did finally get my act together and post a rather pathetic update post in late February, it was a bit disheartening to see the difference in the amount of people reading my posts. Of course, I can't blame anyone for this but myself, nevertheless in typical teenage fashion instead of trying to get back on track, I spent the next however long being angry at the world and avoiding my blog like the plague while basking in a pool of uncreative nothingness.
The next two months that followed were a little better on the blogging front in terms of numbers, but still awful in terms of originality. Whilst sorting through old computer files, I found an article I had written for GCSE English and posted that, and then after a heated argument with a twitter troll decided to give them the attention they craved by dedicating an entire post to them. What was I thinking?! It seems I had become so consumed by the idea that no one was interested anymore because I wasn't posting, that any old rubbish would do as long as it meant I was uploading regularly. What. A. Mess.
Here we are now, halfway through July and I have neglected my blog since April, and in all honesty apart from a few 'I'm such a failure I never commit to anything' panic moments, I've hardly thought about it. The constant pressure I put on myself to come up with new ideas was exhausting, and I slowly just gave up trying because I had none. I unfollowed a lot of bloggers on social media because seeing them upload constantly made me feel inadequate and like I wasn't 'a proper blogger' because I didn't have lots of things ready to share every week and I didn't have sponsorship deals being thrown at me left, right and centre like they did. In the end, I distanced myself from the blogging community so much so that I didn't feel part of it anymore, and I just sat back and enjoyed everyone else's content instead of worrying about my own (or the lack of it).
Understandably, since my last blog post back in April, a lot has happened, a lot has changed and I've missed out on a lot of things in the blogging world. However, I've come to realise a few things. The first being, I've had my blog for less than a year. I am still very much a new blogger in a world of very successful people who have been in the business for literally years. There is no rush and I still have a lot of time to improve and find where I want to put myself within this global community.
Second of all, people do this for a job. Blogging, writing content and any sponsors or additional work they get as a result of it, is their main source of income, so of course they are going to be a hell of a lot more motivated than I am, and ultimately see better results. The full-time blogger life is not for me, and that's ok. I have different career goals and ambitions I want to pursue, and that doesn't make me any less of a blogger than the super-talented people who do it full time. Those guys are incredible at what they do, and you've really got to believe in something to make it work, and they all do. I will to, just in a different type of work. And that's completely fine.
That being said, my final conclusion I came to was that blogging shouldn't have to feel like a chore. This is something fun and rewarding for me to do in my own time, and when I feel like doing it. Who know's what the future holds, I could post six times in the next month, or six times in the next year, but whatever happens it shouldn't and doesn't matter. This is my blog and I will post on my own terms, without letting myself be pressured by myself or what I see around me.
I've probably now made it sound like I've spent the last seven months huddled under a duvet doing nothing, but contrary to everything I've just said, I have actually been quite busy, and that looks to continue throughout the next fews months.
So in between applying for university, getting involved with some very exciting projects and trying to pass my A Levels, expect some very generic blog posts for the time being as I get back into the swing of things and hopefully find some originality and creativity again - that's if I ever had any in the first place.
See you soon (however soon that may be),
Charlotte x
(Here's some photo's from the last few months, to prove to you I haven't spent it all in bed)
(Here's some photo's from the last few months, to prove to you I haven't spent it all in bed)
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